Is travel a part of your husband’s or wife’s job so much so that he/she is hardly home and that you often wonder when he’ll be back? Do you look out at the awning of the window when he goes out through the walkway in order to ride the cab and wish that he’d take you with him? Of course, you can only think of all the kinds of experiences he’ll be having and the food he’ll be enjoying. All these things can seem quite magical especially since your husband isn’t there to fill you in.
But of course, when you free up time, you’ll discover that these trips she undertakes for the company isn’t all about fun. Most of the time your husband is rolling up his sleeves to undertake some major project. When you thought he was lounging, he was also basically struggling to conclude plans which the main branch of the company he is working in has hatched but one which the overseas branches need help implementing.
Since it’s a business trip, there are places you will not have access to. It can get lonely in the hotel room while he’s working and you wish she’d have some sort of unpaid time where he could lavish his attention on you instead of anyone else. Of course, when he became available, most of the work demands had drained all the life out of him. He has lost the zest to go out and explore and scope out the local sights anymore.
Of course by then you would have probably seen by then that these trips aren’t really as refreshing as those R&Rs the both of you would take now and then.
However, you have to realize that your being there for your partner matters to him/her. It provides him with somebody close he can connect with and somebody he can talk about his troubles to no matter if they’re given in the company lingo. There’s also the matter that hotel accommodations aren’t cheap. In a way it’s also a way of relaxing yourself for free.
These trips are neither bad nor good in themselves, it’s just the way we perceive them that matters. Reorienting yourselves will go a long way in making these business trips a lot more relaxing. Take a look at it this way, being together is still a lot better if you stayed in the house.
Here are some insights I’ve learned while going out on trips with my partner in life. Since these little things can spell a stressful stay with your husband and a lonely time by yourself in a hotel room or productive trip for your husband and a great time for yourself, I am very happy to share these things I’ve learned while on the road with my spouse.
Cut the Leash
You need not feel like you’re a woman less of a man while your husband is out trying to bring home the bacon. Don’t also mope when your wife slips out of bed and goes to work while you’re still sleeping.
What you need to do is to think about how you will be able to enjoy your time alone. It is far better to think of the time he’s out as “me time.” Take responsibility for how you are going to spend the time instead of laying all of it on your husband.
Get out and get lost and maybe you’ll discover something about yourself outside the context of your husband. Why don’t you get on the train or take the horse ride in that park somewhere. Never mind if you suddenly discover that you don’t know where you are. It just might be an interesting dinner story once you and your mate meet up.
Help your partner cope with her or his affairs
Of course, when we’re traveling with our partners and we’re only out there to have fun or enjoy ourselves, we don’t know it but we might just be excess baggage our mates don’t need. They will have to plow through several workloads since their time is valuable. They also have to steer several projects while they’re there and might also have to be on call for when stuff comes up. But this trip is simply just not plain fun at all for them.
What we can do is to make things a little convenient for them like allowing them rant if there are things that didn’t go well during their trip or making sure you have something bagged for them when they’re hungry from not eating at work.
Practice being a model partner
Though it might be demeaning to imagine yourself as your wife’s glorified handbag that she takes with her on business parties or the car your husband exhibits to his buddies at his workplace, you needn’t think about it that way. Your partner is just giving a glimpse of his or her home life and therefore a deeper part of his or her personality.
Anything you do and say to her associates during the party could reflect on her. This is the best time to show your best side. In a way, it’s also his or hers too. And of course, when your spouse hears his workmate’s feedback about you, he’d only be too happy to repay you in kind for being good.
Don’t Sulk When the Invite Only Admits One
If your spouse is in a high enough position in the company, chances are she will get invited in places that she won’t be able to bring you along. When this happens, take everything in stride. It’s just business and it is something that doesn’t really involve you personally.
Sometimes, there just some work that needs to be done which will be uncomfortable if there are relatives around. What if the business trip involved high level talks about the union or about discontinuing a plant? Certain orders of business necessitate the utmost confidentiality and these are times when the spouse has to put his business hat on. Going out and eating on your own is far better than being in a room where you’re not welcome.
Declare Business Trips Truce Periods
It is difficult enough to go on and work abroad, what would make it harder if all the issues that should be left at home came with you two packed in the suitcase. Instead of fighting it out for particular behaviors that you found irritating at home, why not throw everything out the window and just enjoy each other’s company. Having a mom and pop’s argument during the business trip is akin to laying out a domestic squabble on the office floor. There are already affairs of the business to attend to, there shouldn’t be marital affairs to be taken up after the office hours have concluded. Just remain patient and try to see each other in a new light since you’re in another country.
Bag a Little Class
To avoid being seen as a mere tag along or worse as your spouse’s assistant, it would be best to bring a little classy clothing with you. Try packing evening wear or a tux. You never know when there are some after work dinners or parties your spouse might be attending where she string you along. This particular advice is corollary to the advice of behaving nicely while in the presence of his workmates. They say after all that clothes make the man, it will certainly help people’s impression of you and ultimately her if you look classy. This will go a long way in helping you feel that you belong just right beside your spouse.
Your Tour, Your Way
Since it is already a given that most of the time you’ll be alone, try to do your side of your couple’s “To Do List.” Since there are restaurants that she would like to scope out or there are spots that he would like to hang out in, avoid doing these particular activities she wants to do.
Instead try to put in all the things you want to do by yourself. Go to the spa you wanted to try but something he found a little too iffy to get into. Watch out that movie showing in the local cinemas – something that she found a little too foreign to her tastes. This will help her feel like she hasn’t lost any opportunities of doing the great stuff she wanted to do with you.
Down Time is Date Time
Not all of your partner’s time will involve being strapped onto the office chair. There are some breaks in the schedule where he can loosen the tie a little or she can take off that office jacket. Just check his or her schedule and anticipate these blocks of free time. When there are such periods, don’t hesitate to spend it together even if its just as few as as thirty minutes. This will be a significant help to your husband as he can be able to skim off that layer of stress and you sneak in some quality time.
Bend to the Wind
Since your spouse is on call during his business trip (the company probably thinks they own your partner for sending him or her over there at their own expense), there are times when work disrupts an evening’s plans. You might be chowing down in a restaurant in the downtown area when suddenly a call comes in asking her about this and that report or asking him to go in to fix a particular technical problem. When these things happen, just chill and be cool. Avoid being flustered. This will certainly help you make the trip less stressful.
Muster Your Powers for the Science of Snippets
Since you’re abroad and you will have to go around and encounter new people, it will be common occurrence that you will be meeting sets and sets of people. Instead of remaining quiet and taking a social nose dive, try to be friendly. Go to people and introduce yourself during your partner’s gatherings. This will also light your partner’s reputation aglow.
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